Too Old

Too Old

My therapist said "regression is normal".
My mother said I was too old
to lay on the floor with a box of crayons
and color in my coloring books.
Too old to wear a plastic tiara outside the house.
Too old to call her "mommy".
My friends said I was fine
and that the Disney princess band aid
covering the shaving cut on my ankle,
was perfectly acceptable.
My ex kissed my lips in the dark of the movie theater
before he told me that he'd found someone new,
but that he'd always love me.
He traced shapes on my forehead with his fingertips
and I silently starting reciting my ABCs
and the names of all the My Little Ponies I had in my room.
My therapist said "regression is normal".
My mother said I was too old
to talk back to my video games
as if there was actually someone there
capable of listening and understanding.
Too old to skip down the street.
Too old to play with Barbies when I had nothing better to do.
My friends said I was fine
and that my Happy Feet obsession
was completely normal,
and that they loved the little penguins too.
My ex held my hand on the Tower of Terror
because he hadn't been on it since he was 5
and he was scared of dying,
and my hand was the only thing keeping him grounded.
I wound my arm with his own like my life depended on it.
And never once did I tell him he was too old
to be scared.